OneGoodArm Swear Scale: Mild Curry
A favourite saying of mine is “and just like that, it’s over”. It helps me to get through difficult times, because literally, in the blink of an eye – whatever it is – is over.
I agonised over my surgery for days and weeks and – just like that – it was 51 days ago. It’s long over. Don’t want to do something, don’t worry, it will be over in a heartbeat.
You may recall my wonderful Aunt who gave me some priceless advice about worrying (Blog: Stop Worrying, That’s an Order – 12 December 2017). Unfortunately that amazing woman took her last breath yesterday morning. So as my saying goes, just like that, it – her life – is over.
I can’t imagine what her children and grand children are going through. She was a beloved mother and grandmother, an amazing salt of the earth mother hen who always told you exactly what she thought.
I recall the second last time I saw her she told my oldest sister that posting photos of food on socials was a ridiculous enterprise that she did not understand. I think her words were something like “why the hell would anyone want to put a picture of their food on facebook or whatever it’s called, it’s friggen STUPID!”.
I happen to agree with her and cheekily and secretly pointed at my sister whilst she was preoccupied with my daughter. The jig was up because my Aunt then directly asked my sister why she would do something so fucking daft. It was hilarious at the time and I was immediately identified as a dobber.
In my sisters defence she is a food connoisseur (also known as a food snob) and only posts shit that both costs a fortune and dances over your tastebuds like magical fairy dust (and in her opinion is a form of art). I still don’t do it but hey, I post photo’s of the fucking sand in my arena so you know – glass house – stones. Etcetera.
So here I am sitting down writing this blog and another person has been removed from our family, from the community, from the planet. It’s hard to comprehend that people die. I have always struggled with it, especially when cancer takes them. Why does your own body attack itself? It is so unfair. There are so many dangers external to your body and your loved ones, you hardly need something inside you to silently be reaping havoc.
It also makes you happy to be alive, well it does for me. I am currently sick with a virus, my baby boy is also sick, Husband is 1350 kilometres away (literally), today it was 40degrees, it has not rained in six hundred years and there is nothing but brown sticks covering our entire property, my horses are all being dickheads because they are not being worked, dust chokes the earth – I won’t go on, but as I felt like shit all day, had sweat running into my eyeballs doing the easiest of activities, watered my four million plants I felt LUCKY.
So lucky to be alive, to be sweating, to be standing there able to run the household including looking after my two babies single handedly and with one arm.
Life is, as we know, fleeting. We do not know how long we have left, it could be years, but what if it isn’t. What if the end is near? Instead of being angry about meaningless shit, be happy, happy that you have something to be shitty about. That you have air in your lungs, that you are – alive.
Well I will anyway. Even with one arm, what do I have to complain about? Not much.
So here’s to my Aunt, the straight talker who always, always, made me laugh. May her spirit, her directness, and her philosophy on worrying, live on always.
Thanks for the memories.